There was a vague twinge in the Universe that woke me from my dreams that night. A soft, wordless whisper that gently grazed my mind with fingers like spring petrichor, wisdom surging from strings of lavender and copper smoke, an electric static burst that exploded around me in the darkness. A message, transcribed in the … More Wake

To Kim – My Brother’s Wife, But a Sister and a Friend Too

  The above photo was from Thanksgiving of 2013. I think you would appreciate it because you were both happy and healthy. There was nothing wrong then. We were just having thanksgiving dinner together and God, looking back, we had so much to be thankful for and so much we took for granted. C’est la … More To Kim – My Brother’s Wife, But a Sister and a Friend Too

The Ugly Cry

I had a tough night last night, full of ugly crying and “friends” who, despite my requests for them to stop, kept mocking me. For the record, this was over how I pronounced “poutine” (in the correct French-Canadian accent), which is stupid. But it was only accentuated by everything else I’m going through, which they … More The Ugly Cry

Breathe to Shame

Tank that idea. I’ve been sitting here for hours thinking that there’s not much left – there’s really not – but there is something. Something reminiscent of tar-stained bones and frequented dive bars, all coiled up in your voice. Striking. Eyes light up across the parking lot as the first person comes out onto the … More Breathe to Shame


Frankly I’m pissed. I know this will bring accusations of selfishness but frankly I’m quite tired of being selfless and it’s time to look out for myself. Frankly I’m tired of poor excuses wrapped up in your cheap liquor And your Friday nights spent at bars And when I ask you for that money You … More Frankly

Quick update

There may be a few of you who follow me here who are familiar with my other blog, amandapaulgerforan.wordpress.com, which I started a couple of years ago and use as a “free write” forum.  I’ve been transferring over some of my more recent poetry from that page today because I like how it came out, … More Quick update


Tired of everything. Ready to dig my own grave Throw myself in after a few bad choices Some harsh words from negative people I still call my friends for whatever reason I can’t exactly fathom. They assume the worst of me instead of the best and that’s what motivates me to get out the shovel … More No

Atlas Body

Today the earth shattered. Mine did, at least. I watched my husband leave me and the kids without even a second glance back. I write this without any added dramatic flair. He told us he was leaving. Midas asked if we had done something wrong. My husband had glared at me, his mouth turning down … More Atlas Body

Whiskey Stones

This time last year you were crying on my couch, wailing and keening for sympathy as you searched for some kind of emotional response.  I stood leaning against the window while you withered on and said nothing. I had no tears for you.  You expected me to respond to your emotional outburst, yet you had … More Whiskey Stones